So what actually is jealousy? Well, according to the Cambridge Dictionary jealousy is a feeling of unhappiness and anger because someone has something or someone that you want. Jealousy has a partner called envy. You see what someone has and you want it too. So jealousy is the fear of losing what you’ve already got, envy is that you want something someone else has. Feelings of jealousy and envy can often cause anxiety, poor self-esteem, and emotional self-sabotage. To better help you understand and cope with jealous feelings, it is important to look at the deeper meanings behind this emotion. It can cause anger, resentment, bitterness, and hostility toward the one who is making you jealous. This does not sound good nor does any good come from it. Yet, we hear time and time again that this guy is jealous over that guy because he is going out with this girl who he wants to go out with. Many times there are fights and even more drastic, someone being murdered. This may make a good movie but in real life this is quite sad. But jealousy isn’t just about wanting this girl or that guy, it can be over anything in life. We see many times that it can be between siblings. Mom or Dad loves you more than me and the result is one not speaking to the other. Valuing who we are and understanding our self-worth is a fundamental step toward managing jealous feelings. According to Mindful Health Solutions: Jealousy is often rooted in insecurities and fears that a person may not even realize they have. These could include fear of oversimplification, fear of inadequacy, fear of abandonment, fear of being replaced, and fear of being judged. By recognizing what lies beneath jealous behaviors, we can look into ways to manage them better. It is important to shift our mindset and see jealousy as a sign of emotional insecurity. This emotional insecurity can be a result of many factors and can have a hazardous effect on your mental health. Acknowledging our insecurities and why we feel jealous can be a crucial step in managing our emotions in healthier ways. It is important to remember that jealousy is an emotion that can affect any of us. Understanding this emotion can help us not only better accept our insecurities, but also make informed decisions depending on the situation. Of course, this is often easier said than done, but with tools such as self-love, mindfulness, and seeking professional help, we can learn to manage these feelings more healthily. Knowledge is power, and by gaining such knowledge with regard to jealousy, we can gain understanding, respect, and trust in our relationships. Here is a song by Spoon: “Jealousy you have never done a thing for me. No, you’ve never done a thing for me. jealousy, jealousy Things go wrong, it sends me somewhere that I don’t belong.”
That’s it! We do not belong anywhere where jealousy and envy lives. It may take time, but let it go, and begin to live by doing the opposite, and that is being happy for the person that you are jealous of and in your happiness you will find joy.